A Funny Thing Happened.....

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dburt
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Post by dburt »

During the late '70's when I was teaching high school in SoCal my wife and I decided to go to the drive-in movies with another couple of teachers who we were friends with. It was in December and it seemed a novel thing to go to the drive-in movies in winter. So we went to see some Christmas theme movie of some kind at the big 4-plex drive in that used to be in Sherman Oaks.

During an intermission my buddy and I went to the snack bar/food court that was indoors and stood inline waiting to order our snacks. As we were standing there, a small kid came running to the line so fast he ran smack dab into me and almost kocked me over. Being a teacher, I was used to high spirited kids and wasn't upset, and just glanced down at the kid and helped him up and turned back to my buddy.

I heard a man's familiar sounding voice, say "son, you apologize to that man for running into him" and I turned to see Mort Sahl, the comedian standing there right next to me. So like a typical stupid tourist type, I turned to my buddy and said, "hey look, it's Mort Sahl!" Then I turned back to Mr. Sahl and stared at him. I am sure he figured he better make me get back to acting normal and get me to quit staring, so he told me he felt bad that his kid ran into me like that. I told him "no problem I am a teacher and am used to that type of thing". His kid said he was sorry, and we then made small take while waiting in line. He was a nice fellow, down to earth, seemed just like a common guy.

Another time we went to the Saugus Speedway one Saturday night because it was known that James Garner went there alot to watch racing, and we thought it would be fun to see him in person if he was there.

Saugus Speedway was a small, local bull ring known for hard racing, fist fights, and grudge matches. As we set there waiting for the action to start, some folks came in and set in the grandstands behind us, and one of the guys caught his foot and stumbled, running into my back. As I turned to see if he was ok, he said "hey man, I'm sorry for running into you". It was the actor that was in all those "High Karate" men's cologne commercials back in those days. I told him no harm done, and he smiled at me and said something about being so clumsy.

During the time we lived in The Valley, in SoCal, we ran into other celebs and they all seemed pretty ordinary, down to earh folks.
Bob
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Finger Story

Post by Bob »

As I said before, Rudy and I have been longtime friends and we were always there to help each other out with our projects. This time I was moving out of my 1963 Roll Along RV into a larger unit...and of course Rudy was there to help. Being musicians we always have recording gear installed in our units. I had some JBL speakers that we decided to mount from the outside in a storage area so that the speakers were facing in. We drilled a hole for the speaker wires...and Rudy was trying to feed them inside to me...but I couldnt find them. Then Rudy had a GREAT idea! He stuck his finger in the hole that we drilled and wiggled it so I could find the hole...so I am inside trying to find Rudys finger...but it wasnt there. He was very upset that I couldnt find his finger and started yelling that it hurt...REALLY bad and that it was stuck. This was a fresh hole drilled through plywood with a lot of splinters around the edges..I was certain that it hurt and I was doing my best to find his finger...but it wasnt where we thought it should be.
After sometime...he finally got it yanked out of the hole..with great pain. We investigated everything trying to figure out where the hole came through to the inside...then Rudy had another great idea. He stuck his finger through the hole again! Of course it became stuck for the second time...maybe worse because it was still sore and swollen from the first round. After listening to him hollering that it hurt REALLY bad..we did manage to free it after some hard yanking. As it turns out there were two plywood walls we had to go through and there was no way to find his finger. Poor Rudy had to lay off guitar playing for a while, but we did manage to get the job done.
PapaBrewsky
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Post by PapaBrewsky »

I've got a Rudy story, too. Rudy used to frequent a local music store called 'Shiloh Music'. We were both good friends with the owner, George, who runs the place. Rudy was calling me a lot at that time, and I would always answer with the name of a business, like "Willy's Water Works","Mike's Furniture" or "Stool's R Us, come by & get your free sample"...you get the idea. Well I was in the Shiloh Music store one Saturday morning, and Rudy called me. I answered "Shiloh Music", and he proceeded to go into some spiel about his accordion. I handed my phone to George, who immediately knew who it was & caught on to the prank. He said "Rudy..Rudy...slow down & start from the beginning.", and handed the phone back to me. There was dead silence for quite some time. Then Rudy said "George??? Did I really call Shiloh Music? I thought I called Jamey." and I said "You did call me, but why did you just call me George?" This went on for awhile. We had him so confused! I had him almost convinced he was having an 'acid flashback'! When I finally 'fessed up to the prank, I've never heard him laugh so hard.
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Dennis The Bus Dweller
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Post by Dennis The Bus Dweller »

THESE REALLY WORK!!

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:

1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.

2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

3... FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.

4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.

7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.

DAILY THOUGHT:

SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRINGA SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.
Peace along the way
Dennis the bus dweller N.Y.
dburt
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Post by dburt »

DennisTBD- those are classics! Especially the one about the toilet lid! It's going to be hard to top those- it will require alot of thinking to come up with something as good or better!
Rudy
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Post by Rudy »

Way back when, I was scheduled to go overseas while I was in the military. I had a pet turtle at that time. I asked my mom to watch over him while I was away. She is afraid of all animals, but she said she would do it. Of course, after a few days, she gave my turtle away to someone she knew who would take care of it. So now I am over there and I write her a letter a few months later and tell her that I am sending her some frogs that I bought. I neglected to tell her that they were five stuffed frogs that were propped up to look like they were in a band playing musical instruments. I must say, at this point, that mom is deathly afraid of ALL animals. So the box arrives at the parent's house and it wasn't until I got back home that I found out that she was afraid to open it, and did not open it for weeks, thinking that I had sent her LIVE frogs. It makes me laugh to think of that. Thanks, Dennis, for bringing these memories back. That was one story that I have not thought of since it happened. It was over 35 years ago. As you say, What a hoot it is hangin' around this website. Rudy
Jones'n4chrome
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Post by Jones'n4chrome »

Dennis, Those remind me of one my Dad always said, I have 5 brothers & 1 sister, so as kids one of us had chapped lips from time to time, so my Dad would say "smear fresh chicken poop on your lips, then you won't lick them so much"
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Dennis The Bus Dweller
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Post by Dennis The Bus Dweller »

:D :D :D
Peace along the way
Dennis the bus dweller N.Y.
Bob
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Post by Bob »

Dads could be tough..I remember riding in the car in over 100 degree temps with the windows up so the neighbors would think we had air conditioning.
Wherever I am...I am home.
Mark B
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Post by Mark B »

Dads can be harsh.

I would say, "I wish I had X." My dad would answer back, "Wish in one hand and $hit in the other; see which fills up faster." This was perplexing, coming from a man that frequently reminded me to wash my hands after using the facilities.

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dburt
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Post by dburt »

My dad was obsessed with making "good time" whenever we traveled anywhere by car. It was a point of honor to shave time off the previous "best time" whenever we took a trip to some place we had been to before, like my grandparents house. Of course when you have three small boys in the back seat, someone is always yelling out that they had to "go to the bathroom".

Trouble was, if you stopped for someone to pee beside the road (forget stopping at a service station to use the restroom!) you added time to the clock that was ticking in my dad's head, and it was hard to go when he was standing over you saying "hurry up, we have to get going" especially if you had a "shy bladder"!

Enter the coffee can, the portable car toilet! We were intructed that if we had to pee, we could go in the coffee can and then hand it to my dad who would empty it out his window as we went down the road. Think of all the time we could save this way!!

There we were going down the road and my older brother has to pee. Dad hands him the coffe can, and he does his thing. He was sitting behind my dad, and so my dad takes the can and proceeds to dump it out the open window of the car. It was summer, it was hot and my brother had his window down. The aerodynamics of a '49 Ford were such that when you emptied a large container of liquid out the front window, when the back window was open, well- the results were disasterous or hilarious, depending on where you were sitting in the back seat.

From my point of view, when my brother got a full face of his own pee hitting him square in the face, well- you can see how it "struck" me watching all this unfold from my point of view on the other side of the back seat!!

My mom had a meltdown in the front seat, yelling and shouting at my dad, my brother was spitting and crying and objecting loudly to this cruel and unusual treatment.

But did this stop my dad from this time saving measure? Why no! He just made sure he held the can lower before turning it around where the slipstream could siphon out the liquid contents. And I always made sure to sit on the other side of the car, and my brother always made sure he had his window rolled up before "the emptying of the can".
Jones'n4chrome
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Post by Jones'n4chrome »

From my point of view, that's funny. If I was your brother the only positive I could see is at least it's my own pee hitting me @ 75mph :x
Rudy
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Post by Rudy »

I guess you could call having the foresight to roll up the back window, "urine therapy"!!!
dburt
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Post by dburt »

Since my mom and dad don't have a computer and will never read these postings, I will tell another one on them! On one trip my mom asked my dad to stop so she could use the restroom. He said, (as all men do)- "there is no where to stop, can't you just wait a little bit longer until we get there?"

Since my mom knew we were still quite a ways away from my grandparent's place, she quickly saw thru his strategy and told him she had to go NOW!

So, dad pulled over on the shoulder of the road and told her she would have to go right there, it was the only place. Since this was at night, he told her no one would see her. Well, mom got out and opened both doors on that side of the old '49 Ford sedan so she could do her thing between the doors.

Now the shoulder of the road was not flat, in fact it was probably closer to about a 45 degree slope after the first couple of feet past the pavement. As she did the Indian squat, she lost her balance, and fell down the slope rolling down into the bar pit (as we say out here in the west) or the ditch at the bottom. In doing so she also lost her composure, her dignity and her temper. She began yelling for my dad to come and help her up, and this could have been one of those times I heard language and volume that we were not accustomed to hearing.

As I recall, this was about the time when mom put her foot down, and insisted on stopping ar real rest stops or service station restrooms.
Dad seemed to know when he was licked, and gave in, however very reluctantly.

He never did set any speed or time records after this either!
Rudy
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Post by Rudy »

That is too funny. I can just imagine her rolling down the hill with her pants around her ankles. I think your dad finally figured he had lost the battle on trying to get to the destination faster.
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