The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant song

[Dennis The Bus Dweller]

This song is called The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant, and it's about a bunch of folks that live in buses and trucks, and the
restaurant, but The Rubber tramp's Restaurant is not the name of the restaurant,
that's just the name of the song, and that's why I called the song The Rubber tramp's
Restaurant.

You can get anything you want at The Rubber tramp's Restaurant
You can get anything you want at The Rubber tramp's Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at The Rubber tramp's Restaurant

Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, was on - two years ago on
Thanksgiving, when my friends and I went up to visit a nice bunch of bus and truck dweller folks at the restaurant, but the bus and truck dweller folks don’t live in the restaurant, they live on the farm and in the woods behind the church nearby the restaurant, near the bell-tower, with there friends Sharkey, Camellia, Roger, Doug, Dburt, Earthhorn, Dennis the bus dweller, Rudy and his dogs. and whoever else might have there homes parked back there. And livin' near the bell tower like that, they got a lot of
room downstairs where the pews used to be in. Havin' all that room,
seein' as how they took out all the pews, they decided that they didn't
have to take out their garbage for a long time.

We got up there, we found all the garbage in there, and we decided it'd be
a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage down to the city dump. So
we took the half a ton of garbage, put it in the back of a blue 1952 Federal 5-ton water truck, took shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed
on toward the city dump.

Well we got there and there was a big sign and a chain across the
dump saying, Closed on Thanksgiving. And we had never heard of a dump
closed on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our eyes we drove off
into the sunset looking for another place to put the garbage.

We didn't find one. Until we came to a side road, and off the side of the
side road there was another fifteen foot cliff and at the bottom of the
cliff there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile
is better than two little piles, and rather than bring that one up we
decided to throw our's down.

That's what we did, and drove back to the church, had a thanksgiving
dinner that couldn't be beat, went to sleep and didn't get up until the
next morning, when we got a phone call from officer Obie. He said, Kids,
we found your name on an envelope at the bottom of a half a ton of
garbage, and just wanted to know if you had any information about it. And
I said, Yes, sir, Officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie, I put that envelope
under that garbage,

After speaking to Obie for about fourty-five minutes on the telephone we
finally arrived at the truth of the matter and said that we had to go down
and pick up the garbage, and also had to go down and speak to him at the
police officer's station. So we got in the blue 1952 Federal 5-ton water truck with the
shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on toward the
police officer's station.

Now friends, there was only one or two things that Obie coulda done at
the police station, and the first was he could have given us a medal for
being so brave and honest on the telephone, which wasn't very likely, and
we didn't expect it, and the other thing was he could have bawled us out
and told us never to be seen driving garbage around the vicinity again,
which is what we expected, but when we got to the police officer's station
there was a third possibility that we hadn't even counted upon, and we was
all immediately arrested. Handcuffed. And we said Obie, I don't think we
can pick up the garbage with these handcuffs on. He said, Shut up, kids.
Get in the back of the patrol car.

And that's what we did, sat in the back of the patrol car and drove to the
quote Scene of the Crime unquote. I want to tell you about the town of
Florence Oregon, where this happened here, they got three stop
signs, two police officers, and one police car, but when we got to the
Scene of the Crime there was five police officers and three police cars,
being the biggest crime of the last fifty years, and everybody wanted to
get in the newspaper story about it. And they was using up all kinds of
cop equipment that they had hanging around the police officer's station.
They was taking plaster tire tracks, foot prints, dog smelling prints, and
they took twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy photographs with circles
and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each
one was to be used as evidence against us. Took pictures of the approach,
the getaway, the northwest corner the southwest corner and that's not to
mention the aerial photography.

After the ordeal, we went back to the jail. Obie said he was going to put
us in the cell. Said, Kids, I'm going to put you in the cell, I want your
wallets and your belts And I said, Obie, I can understand you wanting our
wallets so we don't have any money to spend in the cell, but what do you
want my belts for? And he said, Kids, we don't want any hangings. We
said, Obie, did you think we was going to hang myselves for littering?
Obie said he was making sure, and friends Obie was, cause he took out the
toilet seat so we couldn't hit ourselves over the head and drown, and he took out the toilet paper so we couldn't bend the bars roll out, roll the
toilet paper out the window, slide down the roll and have an escape. Obie
was making sure, and it was about four or five hours later that some other Housetruck and housebus folks (remember The Housetruck and housebus folks? It's a song about The Housetruck and housebus folks ), One of The Housetruck and housebus folks came by and with a few nasty words to Obie on the side, bailed us out of jail, and we went back to the farm and wood behind the church, had a another thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat, and didn't get up until the next morning, when we all had to go to court.

We walked in, sat down, Obie came in with the twenty seven eight-by-ten
colour glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back
of each one, sat down. Man came in said, All rise. We all stood up,
and Obie stood up with the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy
pictures, and the judge walked in sat down with a seeing eye dog, and he
sat down, we sat down. Obie looked at the seeing eye dog, and then at the
twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with circles and arrows
and a paragraph on the back of each one, and looked at the seeing eye dog.
And then at twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with circles
and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one and began to cry,
'cause Obie came to the realization that it was a typical case of American
blind justice, and there wasn't nothing he could do about it, and the
judge wasn't going to look at the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy
pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each
one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence against us. And
we was fined $50 and had to pick up the garbage in the snow, but thats not
what I came to tell you about.

Came to talk about the draft.

They got a building down New York City, it's called Whitehall Street,
where you walk in, you get injected, inspected, detected, infected,
neglected and selected. We went down to get our physical examination one
day, and we walked in, we sat down, got good and drunk the night before, so we looked and felt our best when we went in that morning. `Cause we wanted to look like the all-American kids from all over the country, man we wanted, we wanted to feel like the all we wanted to be, the all American kids from all over this here country, and we walked in, sat down, we was hung down, brung down, hung up, and all kinds o' mean nasty ugly things. And we walked in and sat down and they gave us a piece of paper, said, Kids, see the phsychiatrist, room 604.

And we went up there, we said, Shrink, we want to kill. we mean, we wanna, we wanna kill. Kill. KILL! We wanna, We wanna see, We wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth. Eat dead burnt bodies. We mean kill, Kill, KILL, KILL. And We started jumpin up and down yelling, KILL, KILL and he started jumpin up and down with us and we was all jumping up and down yelling, KILL, KILL, KILL! And the sargent came over, pinned a medal on us all, sent us down the hall, said, You're our kind of kids. Didn't feel too good about it.

Proceeded on down the hall gettin more injections, inspections,
detections, neglections and all kinds of stuff that they was doin' to us
at the thing there, and we was there for two hours, three hours, four
hours, we was there for a long time going through all kinds of mean nasty
ugly things and we was just having a tough time there, and they was
inspecting, injecting every single part of us, and they was leaving no
part untouched. Proceeded through, and when we finally came to the see the last man, we walked in, walked in sat down after a whole big thing there,
and we walked up and said, What do you want? He said, Kids, we only got
one question. Have you ever been arrested?

And we proceeded to tell him the story of The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant Massacre, with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff like that and all the phenome... and he stopped us right there and said, Kids, did you ever go to court?

And we proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten
colour glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on
the back of each one, and he stopped us right there and said, Kids, I want
you to go and sit down on that bench that says Group W .... NOW kids!!!

And we, we walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to us! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the bench next to us. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
father raper of them all, was coming over to us and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to us
and said, Kids, whad'ya get? We said, we didn't get nothing, we had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage. He said, What were you arrested for, kids?
And I said, Littering. And they all moved away from us on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till we
said, And creating a nuisance. And they all came back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, held it
up and said.

Kids, this-piece-of-paper's-got-47-words-37-sentences-58-words-we-wanna-know-details-of-the-crime-time-of-the-crime-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say-pertaining-to-and-about-the-crime-I-want-to-know-arresting-officer's-name-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta say, and talked for forty-five minutes and nobody understood a word that he said, but we had fun filling out the forms and playing with the pencils on the bench there, and we filled out the massacre with the four part harmony, and wrote it down there, just like it was, and everything was fine and we put down the pencil, and we turned over the piece of paper, and there, there on the other side, in the middle of the other side, away from everything else on the other side, in parentheses, capital letters, quotated, read the following words:

(KIDS, HAVE YOU REHABILITATED YOURSELF?)

We went over to the sargent, said, Sargeant, you got a lot a damn gall to
ask us if we've rehabilitated ourselves, we mean, we mean, we mean that just, we’s sittin here on the bench, we mean we’s a sittin here on the Group W bench cause you want to know if we’s moral enough join the army, burn women, kids, houses and villages after bein' a litterbug. He looked at us and said, Kid‘s, we don't like your kind, and we're gonna send you fingerprints off to Washington.

And friends, somewhere in Washington enshrined in some little folder, is a
study in black and white of our fingerprints. And the only reason we’re
singing you this song now is cause you may know somebody in a similar
situation, or you may be in a similar situation, and if your in a
situation like that there's only one thing you can do and that's walk into
the shrink wherever you are, just walk in say Shrink, You can get
anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant . And walk out. You know, if one person, just one person does it they may think he's really sick and they won't take him. And if two people, two people do it, in harmony,
they may think they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.
And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people walking in
singin a bar of The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant and walking out. They may think it's an organization. And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day, we said fifty people a day walking in singin a bar of The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant and walking out. And friends they may thinks it's a movement.
And that's what it is , The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and all you got to do to join is sing it the next time it come's around on the guitar.

With feeling. So we'll wait for it to come around on the guitar, here and
sing it when it does. Here it comes.

You can get anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant
You can get anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant

That was horrible. If you want to end war and stuff you got to sing loud.
We've been singing this song now for twenty five minutes. We could sing it
for another twenty five minutes. We’re not proud... or tired.

So we'll wait till it comes around again, and this time with four part
harmony and feeling.

We're just waitin' for it to come around is what we're doing.

All right now.

You can get anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant
Excepting Camellia
You can get anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant

Da da da da da da da dum
At The Rubber tramp’s Restaurant

[Rudy]

Wow Dennis, You certainly are inspired today. There must be a lot of things that we do not know about you. I would love to sit down and talk with you. I am sure the conversation would last for hours. Then we could have some of your apple pie. Are you spending this day alone?

[Dennis The Bus Dweller]

Good morning Rudy and bus and truck dwellers everywhere

I hope all of you guys and gals have a great day. The kid and I are serving at a local soup kitchen till about 3 and then it's off to a friends house for some food and laughs

[Rudy]

Dennis, It is great that you have a child that lives close to you. It is wonderful that you are volunteering to go serve the food lines. I learned that the moment you give love is the moment that you receive love. I wish that I was living close to you so that I could feel the wonderful human traits that you possess. Rudy

[Dennis The Bus Dweller]

We're all just a few weeks or a month away from the food line there buddy. Over my 53 years I've done very well and me and mine have been pretty close to the bottom at other times ( we are sure to be in both those places again before our life is over ) and we've been both happy and bumed in both of those times in our lives and those exsperiences brought us to who we are today. We’re just a couple of regular folks that know the deal. Buckup little campers, Great times are on there way

[Rudy]

Dennis, What are those GREAT times that you speak of? I cannot let go of my GLOOM AND DOOM ideas. Perhaps if I was not SO alone, I would have a better outlook on the future. It is easy to fend for your loved ones. You would even take a bullet for them, but when you are just by yourself, you lose direction.

[splummer]

hey i know that song i hope everyones having a good day we just got home , will have to catch up later, oh rudy did i ever tell you i played at the gutherie center

[Rudy]

Steve, Are you saying that you played music there? It would be nice if you could tell us about your gig on the Music Central forum. Thanks, Rudy

[splummer]

i did but i have to say arlo wasnt there , no one was there except the girl who was running the center , my wife and me. we were on our way to penn/ and we wanted to stop by at the center, and i also have my guiter in the truck so i ask the girl if i could play my guiter in the churck and the accoustics were great. my claim to flame lol oh yeah one more . will tell it later my story with jaimie brockett and jonh b sebastion

[Rudy]

Steve, Since this conversation is centered around Arlo Guthrie, I have to divulge just a little information about my past. For many years I played a lot of gigs. I opened up for many famous people. Even though my friend Howard wants me to divulge my illustrious career as a performer, I will only tell you about this one fun gig now. Arlo Guthrie was scheduled to play at this club in California. The capacity of the club was 960 people. I was hired to open up for him. I always got to my shows early.
So, I load my equipment in and set it up. At that time I was playing six and twelve string acoustic guitar with fingerpicks and using a bottleneck slide. While I was setting up, I noticed a big bowl of fruit on a table on the stage.
The only picture of Arlo Guthrie that I had in my mind was from an album from twenty years prior.
So, while I am setting up, a guy with long grey hair and beard comes on stage and asks me if I would like some fruit. Well, I, at first, did not realize who this person was. Suddenly, it dawned on me that it was Arlo Guthrie. In answer to his question, I said sure, I would like some fruit. So I picked some apples and oranges. I then looked at him and said, "I didn't know it was you."
I was so impressed by how friendly he was. He was excited about my guitar playing as well.
I have lots of stories about that time in my life. I will post them on Music Central. There is one about Doc Watson that will make you cry. It makes me cry when I think back on it.

[splummer]

love to hear more arlo stories and of course doc watson

[Rudy]

I will tell of meeting Arlo's sister in DC and, of course, my Doc Watson story on the Music Central forum tomorrow evening.

[splummer]

cant wait to read it i will have to wait till sunday nite back to work tomorrow till sun nite, been gone fro 3 weeks and have to get used to being there will read it as soon as i get home, cant wait

[GoodClue]

Hello all ... Thanks for the Giving ... I really aprreciate it.

Had a wonderful homecooked Thanksgiving meal, Rulaten ... spelling? with my 90 year old Mother, going over early photos in Europe ... I've been scanning them for my older brother and I, he currently lives in Oregon ... with Mom, the three of us and my brother's imediate family are all that's left.

I was born in Frankfurt, Germany in '49 ... dad was reassigned there after he fought there in WWII. We lived a short while in Budingen, then Schwanheim, finally living the last three years in Dachau before we came to the US in '55 when I was six. We lived in the SS quarters, the concentration camp was my back yard ... needless to say I have a different comprehension of war than most born in the States ... I was lucky, the Berlin Airlift bgan when I was born .. the start of the Cold War with Soviet Russia, but what I grew up with was the reconstruction of WWII's aftermath, a world rebuilding itself ... and Rudy, that's what I still want to do, rebuild, heal, let go of the old horror and learn to share the good.

In 1990 I went back to Nuremberg, Germany with Nakata Engineering, one of several such companies I've done contract work for ... I'd been a field tech off and on for years, the one that actually does the measuring and entering of data for the engineers to crunch ... I was lucky to find that work, being a field boilermaker was more of a war zone than most places I'd seen in my life, and I jumped at the chance to use my brain instead of oil field or nuke plant work with an insane, backfighting, drug and alchohol infested union only interested in extreme wages, nothing else... though I still love to weld, I prefer using it for art and busses, and I wouldn't mind applying it to Wind generators or the like 'cept that I doubt I'll ever go back into the real world as an employee.

I revisited Dachau and saw the irrigation ditch that ran through the camp that Dad found me dangling in the water hanging on to barbed wire and saved my life from as a youngster ... tried to get to Berlin to get a piece of the wall that had just come down November 1989 before ... one of the milestones of my life, the tearing down of walls ... but didn't get the op to go there, had to stay in central and southern Germany for the job.

I asked Mom and she said she was pregnant with me when we went overseas ... I've crossed the ocean by ship twice in my life, and still prefer boats and busses to planes ...

An aside ... the Gypsies, nomads of Europe in their amazing mobile homes, were put in the camps along with Jews, free thinkers, intellectuals and those of us considered dangerous to the state ... sound familiar?

The gist of this rambling is to say, if you happened to watch the editor's cuts of Alice's Restaurant, THE classic documentary of an amazing era parallelling many of our 60's lifestyles...at the end Arlo says they had to make the movie ending negative towards that lifestyle. What he says that's so encouraging is, the real party never stopped ...

Bless all who truly educate, entertain, and bring joy to this world ...

"God bless us all, everyone" says Tiny Tim ... and THANKS Sharkey, for letting me participate ... a real learning and giving experience.
Doug

[Bob]

I enjoyed the Alice's twist...Funny thing about that song is that for some unknown reason, I remember every single word of it. I have a hard time remembering lyrics to 3 minute songs that are my own...it kinda freaks me out. I often perform Alice's Restaurant on Thanksgiving at some unfortunate venue, and the Rice A Roni theme song fits as well and is a nice way to finish it...actually any finish to it is a good thing. I love it!