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Gettin to the tuff stuff

Posted: Thu Nov 18, 2010 5:31 am
by Dennis The Bus Dweller
I mentioned a few months back that I was going to help build another house for my buddy Rob who has a nasty case of cancer. Well, the house is about ½ done and Rob is about 7/8 done so I’m going up to the hospital to have a talk with him. And if he can talk. And if not I’m going to leave this letter with his sister so she can read it to some time soon. He’s a real control freak and that control has made him a pretty wealthy guy but all those bucks and all those homes can’t help him now so I hope my letter will give the kid some comfort.

Hi Rob

If you or one of your family is reading this letter to you, you must be nearing the end of the big project. You got to admit, I went pretty well 8) I want you to know that you’re up on my mental shelf along side a half a dozen other people that have impacted my life. When I think of focus and drive I think of you. Never have I known anyone with the level of drive that you’ve possessed ( you make me tired just thinking about it :wink: That drive is what I want to bring to the forefront here. That drive is at this point causing you great pain and suffering. Believe me when I say, I still hope you can come out of this “butâ€

Posted: Thu Nov 18, 2010 9:27 am
by rlaggren
Dennis,

That letter looks like what a lot of us better hope somebody sends us come a time. Hope Rob takes it the best way.

Rufus

Posted: Sat Nov 20, 2010 5:27 am
by dburt
It's hard for type A persons to ever let go of the control, but hopefully he will listen to this letter!

Posted: Sat Nov 20, 2010 6:35 am
by Stealth Camper
My condolences to you and your friend's family!

My consolation with times like that is that it is only a temporary separation - even if I live to be 120, it will still be a very short time until meet again.

I went through a time a couple years ago where I lost 12 very close friends and family members in a 14 month period of time. It sucks.

Posted: Sat Nov 20, 2010 5:29 pm
by longjohn
Dennis! Nuff said :) Lots of us wish we had friends like you..............

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2010 11:49 am
by ezrablu
I haven't been here long to know much about any of you, but I have lost a several family members and friends to cancer. And from my experience, you are doing the right thing to speak bluntly to your friend...even if he can't respond, he'll be listening.

When most people run into someone they know who has cancer or go visits them in the hospital...they try to hard to keep conversation casual and very surface. But what they don't realize is that person knows darn well how close to death they are or how sick they are and the last thing they need are people pretending "it'll be ok and let's get together when you get out".

It's fake and insincere. These people are taking the biggest and last step of their lives. They want to hear honesty. They want to hear real feelings and thoughts. Maybe you telling him it's ok to die is what he needs to hear so he can be at peace with it instead of everybody telling him "you'll get through this cuz you're stubborn".

You're a good and wise friend, Dennis.

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2010 7:33 pm
by Dennis The Bus Dweller
As it turned out Robs younger brother read him the letter "he had a little trouble getting through it" but his wife said that Rob was smiling and wont let anyone take the letter from his nightstand. So, will he let got? Probably not but he loved the idea of letting go :wink: Soon, he'll have no choice and he'll be at peace. Lifes a trip, ain't it 8)

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 3:07 am
by Dennis The Bus Dweller
As it turns out, My buddy Rob moved on just after midnight. Peace along the way Rob :roll:

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 10:36 am
by ezrablu
Sorry for the loss of a buddy. That was a kind thing you did for him.

Happy trails to you, until we meet again.
Some trails are happy ones,
Others are blue.
It's the way you ride the trail that counts,
Here's a happy one for you.
~Dale Evans

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 11:06 am
by Dennis The Bus Dweller
Ya know, “Ifâ€

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 3:09 pm
by rlaggren
Darned if getting back to work isn't the best thing to do sometimes...

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 3:25 pm
by Griff
You were a true friend to Rob, may he rest in peace, I'm sure he treasured your friendship.

May your heart be at peace also, Dennis.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkKnTl7oVUQ

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 6:25 pm
by longjohn
Dennis, Tho I dont know you that well, What i do know about you is that your buddy Rob's condition has been a condition for you also because or your friendship. Griff wrote"You were a true friend to Rob, may he rest in peace, I'm sure he treasured your friendship.

May your heart be at peace also, Dennis.


As i said before WE should all be so lucky as to have friend like you!

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2010 11:10 pm
by Rudy
Perhaps Rob can look across from the other plane of existence and see the craftsman you continue to be. That should make him happy.

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 2:24 pm
by Stealth Camper
Sorry to hear about that. My condolences to you and his family!